men & psychotherapy

Cultural molding can lead to an abrasive life experience for men.


Male oppression teaches boys that vulnerability, tears, & emotional intimacy (especially with other males) is taboo. These relational prohibitions change the course of a man's social and psychological development. Many adult men remember shutting down after being bullied as boys (at home or by peers) because they did not display enough stoicism. Males  speak of feeling envy or fear of their female partners' capacity to cry and to support one another. When times are difficult a man might feel trapped in their relationship. Gay men are culturally victimized and may have lived life, even as children, feeling separate or marginalized by homophobia.

When overwhelmed or scared by life's upheavals, males sometimes turn towards isolation, substances or social addictions, and avoiding the comfort of their relationships.   

In our therapy you will learn to decrease alexythymia, a technical term for a lack (or fear) of feeling, and of understanding or describing feelings. We will also heal the pain of what may be an Avoidant Attachment style, so you become more securely attached in your relationships.  

Psychotherapy with a highy skilled, safe female allows defenses and knee-jerk relational avoidance to be soothed and calmed. For men, vulnerable states, relationships, closer communication, and emotional intelligence are the new brave.